February 2012
44 posts
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“If you love a flower that lives on a star, it is sweet to look at the sky at...”
– Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
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“My thoughts are stars I can’t fathom into constellations.”
– Augustus, The Fault in Our Stars
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Twelve-twenty-nine in the morning. All I can think about is how I’ll never be a kid again, child at heart and in mind I may be. How times have passed and shan’t ever return. How my life, this short span of years, is all I’ve got and all I’ll ever have. How I am all I’ll ever be. Time to go to sleep I think; time to go… somewhere else.
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“All beings are flowers
Blossoming
In a blossoming universe.”
– Nakagawa Soen Roshi
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do you guys want to see baby/toddler pictures of me
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“I tell you, the more I think, the more I feel that there is nothing more truly...”
– Vincent van Gogh (via loveyourchaos)
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I think a boy in one of my classes is really cute and I like him quite a bit considering we’ve only talked to each other twice a week for barely a month now but I often catch him staring at me during class out of the corner of my eye and he’s so nice and kind and gentle when we speak and his eyes are such a pretty light brown and his skin is pale and perfect and he’s half...
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“And men said that the blood of the stars flowed in her veins.”
– The Silver Chair, by C. S. Lewis
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I just have weird conceptions about the emptiness of the world, I think. About people, about places, about time and times, about meanings and meaninglessness. In my quest for the ultimate truth, I ran far, far away from what I thought I didn’t want it to be. And now the mother is calling her wayward, foolish child back. Back to her embrace, back to her warmth and love. And I am returning. I...
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“I have to re-create the universe every morning when I wake up. And kill it in...”
– Björk
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Tabula Rasa: Ludus | Arvo Pärt
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“one more won’t hurt” i whisper to myself as i lie in bed alone on a saturday night and press play on my ninth consecutive hour-long episode
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“I hoped for nothing. And yet I lived in expectation.”
– Stanisław Lem
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“He was alone. He was unheeded, happy, and near to the wild heart of life. He was...”
– James Joyce, Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
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“There is no one torturing you except yourself. There is nobody except yourself;...”
– Osho
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“Only the liberation of the natural capacity for love in human beings can master...”
– Wilhelm Reich
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“Your body needs to be held and to hold, to be touched and to touch. None of...”
– Henri Nouwen
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(.●´﹏`●.)
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Today in my abnormal psychology class, we watched a video circa nineteen-sixty-eight of behaviour analysts attempting to teach children afflicted by Autism to speak. It’s really quite amazing what can be accomplished through behaviour therapy! Anyhow, the children were so, so precious. There was one blond boy, Charles I think was his name, who never learned to speak but would instead just...
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“An indescribable oppression, which seemed to generate in some unfamiliar part of...”
– Kate Chopin, The Awakening
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Literally getting paid to do absolutely nothing. No one ever comes to get tutored in anthropology. I’m positively bored to death every single day, but this is money I use to buy beautiful fresh flowers each week (some of which I craft into flower crowns!), so I shan’t complain.
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“One may have a blazing hearth in one’s soul and yet no one ever come to sit by...”
– Vincent Van Gogh
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“Recognize that the very molecules that make up your body, the atoms that...”
– Neil deGrasse Tyson
boys with flowers in their hair
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“But the eyes are blind. One must look with the heart.”
– Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
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“That evening, as I watched the sunset’s pinwheels of apricot and mauve slowly...”
– Diane Ackerman
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“I have tried insofar as possible to avoid getting involved in the sordid...”
– 人間失格 | Dazai Osamu, No Longer Human
January 2012
42 posts
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“Everything passes. That is the one and only thing I have thought resembled the...”
– 人間失格 | Dazai Osamu, No Longer Human
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“One time, as the cold wind blew and she kept watch over the playground, Aomame...”
– Haruki Murakami, 1Q84
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“The only dream worth having is to dream that you will live while you are alive,...”
– Arundhati Roy
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“Our greatest strength lies in the gentleness and tenderness of our heart.”
– Rumi
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wow, last night was intense. as i was typing the last paragraph of this post, i started to cry. and cry. and cry. it wouldn’t stop, and i couldn’t put was i was crying for into words. i suppose at first it was for hope; the small, flickering flame in my heart that refuses to go out, burning forever in the hope of finding love, and happiness, and connectedness. and then i realized just...
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i consider suicide every waking moment of my life, but people don’t take me seriously if i try to mention it. why must i be so mentally melodramatic? i wish i was more crazy on the outside, because then i probably would have gotten locked up in a mental institution long ago. instead, i’m fully functional. so i feel like my “problems” aren’t real.
also, i’ve...